My Parents Don’t Like My Hijab
Waleed Basyouni

If your parents are unsupportive or uncomfortable with your hijab, stand up for your choice but above all, don’t stand up to battle.

Explain your reasons, your happiness with your choice, and your determination in a way that educates instead of confronts or criticizes your parents for their discomfort.

And remember, when you please Allah, Allah will make people pleased with you. It may take a while, but InshaAllah your family members can come around to accept and perhaps even love your choice.

TRANSCRIPTION:
Alhamdulillah was-salatu wa salamu 'ala Rasulullah. This sister is asking about her parents, they're not very happy with her wearing hijab. They're not very supportive, not comfortable being around her when she is in her hijab. Maybe she's a new Muslim and I can understand that or comes from a non-religious, non-practicing family who happen to be Muslim.

What I will advise you to do is to educate them. Okay. Don't turn this to be a battle and to basically a war between you and your family. Make sure that this is one issue. But there is other hundreds and thousands of other issues between you and them that connect you guys together. Educate them. Let them know why you wear hijab. Why did you choose to do that? It's your choice. How proud you are of yourself when you wear hijab, how much it means to you.

And many time people feel that everybody going to look at them and tell them that's not the case. People accepting it and let them maybe visit the masjid, see muhajabahs [people who wear hijab] around them and they will feel comfortable.

Assure them that "this is not something which can put me in any danger by wearing hijab," because some people have a concern about the safety of their daughters or their wife if she wear hijab. Take your time. I know many family, Muslims family, it takes them a long time to accept hijab at home, to accept their daughter to wear hijab or their sisters or their wives. I know some sisters stayed years, will not go outside their house with their husband just because she wears hijab.

And I know young girls told me their stories - they stayed a very long time, could not get outside the house with their parents because they refuse to go out with her. But in the end is beautiful ending. They accept that, they apologize and they saw that she really wears hijab because she wants to do that, because she wants to do what is right in her opinion. And that will please Allah (subhanahu wa ta'ala). Try to please Allah (subhanahu wa ta'ala) and Allah (subhanahu wa ta'ala) will make people be pleased with you. When you please Allah, Allah will be pleased with you and make people insha'Allah pleased with you as well. But if you displease Allah (subhanahu wa ta'ala), He will be displeased with you, and people will not be pleased with you anyway.

And I'll say also, maybe there is the way the style of your hijab is also turning them off. Maybe you need to re-evaluate the way you put your hijab. Do a compromise that keep you in the shar', in the realm of Shari'ah, what is lawful. And maybe it will make them happy and accept that. But in the end of the day, make a lot of du'a that Allah (subhanahu wa ta'ala) gives you strength. And I ask Allah (subhanahu wa ta'ala) to guide you, to keep your hijab and to convince your parents to accept it. Wa sallAllahu wa sallam 'ala nabiyyina Muhammad.

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